Seriously. A Has Been?

I've still got my fire and fight! 

I'm a get straight to the point. I've always been and still is all about empowering the younger generation and I still believe that the world today belongs to them. I don't think there's two ways about it. 

So it all started when MOH and I had our first date night out in public after a hundred days (because you know, the whole Covid-19 shenanigan). During our conversation that lovely evening, as we were discussing our lives, he labeled the both of us "has beens". 😑😑😑 Say whaaaat?? For a couple of weeks, I let it stew, silently protesting the label he bestowed upon us. And then something happened at work (more on this later so better read on!) and my alarm bells went ding-ding-ding!! 

We were at the final week of the mysterious what-happened-to-2020, reflecting our deeds, purpose and next course of action when I finally approached MOH again and spoke to him about this "has been" label he tagged us with. I said I didn't agree that we were. I brought him back to our journey from "green-headed" fresh graduates to where we are today. "Don't you remember a time where we first started? The jail time we did? The School of Hard Knocks we attended?" I recalled one particular memory during my early agency days - there was an art director, long-haired, torn jeans, a chain smoker (as was most creative people back then), but let not his exterior demeanor fool you - he was a perfectionist. We had a photo shoot that day for a coffee brand (no names mentioned) for a print ad. Uncle C (I called him Uncle to annoy him 😂😂😂), spent over half a day blowing his cigarette smoke into a cup of black coffee, which by then was totally undrinkable, to get that perfect shot for our print ad. A million shots plus another 2 miserable hours later, he was scrutinizing the negatives with his left eye shut tight (to those youngsters who has no idea what the hell are negatives - remember we never had digital cams back then!) to select the best and only the best shot to be used in said print ad. It was through many, many years of going through arduous processes such as this that our generation learnt the value of quality. We knew that quality was our reputation and was what got us earning clients' money respectfully. Careless mistakes were a no-no. (I remember once I had the negative flipped and had a giant banner printed the other way round. OMFG, when the banner went up the building's walls, my pee nearly came out from fright!!) 

Anyway, MOH said he agreed that we knew the value of quality. But the speed in which things moved these days, unfortunately nobody has half a day to spend perfecting a freaking cup of coffee for a photo shoot. "Are you saying speed supersedes quality?" MOH said quality is still important but he brought home one point -  the traditional channels of TV, Print and Radio didn't go through dramatic changes in over 50 years. The Facebook, YouTube and etc gets an update every other freaking week! "Programmatics isn't new and has been around since the dotcom era. It hasn't even matured and something else has come along! Who has the time to perfect the science or the arts?" he said. I concurred. 

But I still refused to be labeled a "has been". MOH continued on and said everything the youngsters do these days were focused on MVPs, execution, execution and more execution because of the speed of things today. I get the whole speed issue. C'mon, when it comes to working fast, many youngsters in Myanmar still has a long way to catch up with me. Ask anyone. I dare ya to say that I work slow! Anyway, I continued arguing with him. "Our  has-been foundation which was built on rock-solid knowledge and process of strategic thinking surely should count for something???" Apparently yes, thank blady God. So we continued our discussion and we did agree on the fact that working for younger leadership teams would do us better. We felt that the youngsters are less afraid of failure because they have all the time in the world to keep failing. Which means, they are more likely to take risks, to jump higher, to go further, and most importantly - to innovate harder. We can learn from them the disruptive trends of today and they can learn from our experiences and strategic foundations. This synergy can create magic. I then recalled a time where a well-known 80-year-old marketer came to do a seminar and I fell asleep 😅😅😅 (just imagine, I aced the marketing subject of his textbook!). I would rather sit for a session listening to an up-and-coming start-up dynamo kid because, what did I say earlier? The world belongs to these kids! 

Throughout our careers, I believe our generation had been fluid and agile, taking in Bruce Lee's advise : "Be like water" and we've adapted and changed and kept ourselves relevant with the trends in marketing. From 4Ps to 5Ps to the dotcom boom, to the social media explosion, to omni channel, to CX-obsessed and the list goes on. How can he say we are "has beens" ??? We had a strong solid foundation and that helped us keep building ourselves on top of it. How can we be has beens??? 

I was obviously relentless in protesting the label. The discussion continued.  

I brought in examples of when we were needed to explain with our dying breath (sense the sarcasm) to C-levels we worked with on why we shouldn't be spamming people on social media (posting as and when you like is not strategic content scheduling!!), why we need to spend time to adhere to brand guidelines, why we need to be more targeted with our digital media buys (because it's NOT THE SAME as media placements on print or TV!!! 🤦🤦🤦) and this list can go on too. And so I said, "If I am a has been, these folks must be relics!!" (and I can't stand those who keep shoving their status in my face and the fact that I need to respect that status) And he nailed home his point further - so imagine, at our age, if you kept working with them for another 5yrs - where would you be? This caught me off-guard. I was speechless. MOH looked at me winningly. "You ever thought about that?"  Truth was, no, I didn't. My gawd, food for thought indeed 🤔🤔🤔

Something happened at work a couple weeks back that set off alarm bells for me. It had to do with this whole fancy term of "agile" that seemed to be on everyone's lips these days. I'm like please, I've been teaching the 'agile vs waterfall process' in my digital class since 2017. It's just another fancy term for Project Management. Anyway, as per usual, I've had to use my dying breath to explain and explain and get my point through. But this time I literally just ... lost my breath. I died. I didn't care. I told the team I was working with - they could throw my PPT file out the window and it was fine by me. And I actually meant it. I had no feeling whatsoever! I didn't wanna lead and I told the team to just let me know what support would be needed. I could see a million things going wrong but my 'dying breath' literally emptied out so I didn't even bother pointing these out. To those who know me will know that my dying breath never runs out. If I knew something was right I would fight and bulldoze through, no matter what the consequences were and no matter who I was facing. I am emotional at work and coupled with my passion, I'm fiery! When I adopted that "tidak apa" attitude (in Malay it means "whatever") the alarm bells went off. Especially so close in timing after being labeled a "has been" 😖😖😖

You see, for me, I think a "has been" is someone who has lost the fire and the fight. I still have passion in the work that I do. I still love every minute of seeing the planning come to live. While I believe very much in empowering the young people, bringing them to the forefront in leadership positions while I take a backseat, I haven't lost my fire nor my fight! I don't want to lose that indeed. Then I'll really be a "has been" !  

MOH as per usual, kept things in perspective for me. He said, "You can choose to use all of that fire and fight to burn a small hole in the field. OR you can choose to use that same fire and fight to set the damn field ablaze." He said he has reflected upon this and admits that he was tired of burning that small hole. 

Which brought to mind something Jack Ma said in an interview before : 

"When you're 40-50 years old, you have to do all the things you are already good at. Don't try to jump into a new area, it's too late. You may be successful but the rate of dying is too high (Me : 😂😂😂 ) So, at 40-50 years old, think about - How can I focus on things that I am good at?"

"When you are 50-60 years old, work to support young people, because young people can do better than you. Rely on them, invest in them. Make sure they're good to go." 

Well Jack, my friend, thank you. Though, I kinda jumped the gun a bit and have already done the making sure the young people are good to go. But I'm pretty sure that's ok. 😁😁😁 

We're both not "has beens" c'mon. We were not people who refused to change our mindsets. We were not people with humongous egos that listening to young people or letting them give directions were beneath us. We were not people who had a chip on our shoulders and clung on to some status or titles. FINALLLLYYYYY..... MOH relented and admitted that he could've used the wrong label, though sounded more like he didn't want me to go on and on about it. I wanted to slap him! 🙄🙄🙄 

So 2021...... I'm a get in with my tanks, machine guns and grenades and I'm a set the damn field ablaze. Who's with me? 😈😈😈

2020..... Who Would've Ever Guessed?

What's in store for 2021? 

It's almost the end of 2020 and I'm sure the feels is for 2020 to be over ASAP. Some may have been impacted badly by the Covid-19 pandemic where as others may have had the opportunity to ride atop the waves of challenges. As for MOH (My Other Half) and I, we're.... ok.

For me, work and fitness training has continued to take up 70% of my time. There are a few new "new normal" projects that I've found myself being involved in and that's keeping me busy - which is a good game plan so that I don't leave an idle mind worrying about Mama & Papa back home too much.

I've also resumed my Digital Strategy classes with Strategy First University via Zoom. Look, as much as I like the concept of physical distancing... I realize one of the hardest thing I've had to do is to teach over Zoom. Somehow the interaction and engagement just isn't the same. And obviously being able to physically slap my students as opposed to threatening to slap them virtually is very different 😑😑😑 MOH calls it my "weekly shouting session" and I'm pretty sure the neighbours are all aware of me by now. I'm trying my best, finding ways to make it worth everyone's while to sit through a class with me. But over the years, I've also realized one thing about the students here in Myanmar. They DO want to learn. However it seems to be more important for them to have the discipline to sit through 22 weeks of lessons than to try harder to understand the concepts of the lessons. By quietly and diligently sitting thru, they create no trouble and at the end of the 22 weeks, they get to include a certificate of completion into their CV. I'm sorry, that doesn't work for my classes. One of the format changes that I've made is to send over pre-reading materials. I know English is not their first language and as such my notes are always void of any big jargon wherever possible. Even when I give them the notes one week ahead, they still come back saying they do not understand the notes. Worse - some simply do a quick glance through the notes. During physical classes, they claimed they are unable to remember the lessons as I do not provide lecture handouts. But when I provide notes, they don't really use them. I think everyone knows this is a very familiar Myanmar situation and I liken it to the authorities' statements pertaining Covid-19 : "Can restaurants open? Yes." In the very next paragraph : "Do restaurants have to remain close? Yes". This is Myanmar. Yes, you say. No, also you say. Literally do and say as u like 😭😭😭 I told the current class though - if English was their excuse, they have basically closed the door to a whole world of learning out there. In any case, I won't stop trying. Though if any teachers out there can give me some pointers, I'd appreciate it alot!!!

I've also started taking on some other consultation and coaching projects for new teams and new brands. I've my calendar lined-up for sure! I'm spending the remainder of my time upgrading my skills. I'm at the point of my career where I want to be even more specialized. I love writing and while I know I'm a very creative and imaginative fiction writer, my business digital writing should level up. As such, I have taken to learning about strategic SEO writing. I've also began to look at Diversity & Inclusion Marketing, although I do think Myanmar just will not have much opportunities for me in these areas. But oh well, learning never go to waste. BTW,  it's amazing how much time you save from sitting thru traffic really. On another note, I had managed to obtain online, my Diploma in Social Psychology and a Diploma in Sports Nutrition within 2020. There is a Conservation Marketing course that I am eyeing, but this is a little intensive so I'm having another thought about it.

As for MOH, some may already know, he's been jobless since October. Yup, he resigned from his company. Initially, I was quite upset about how it all happened. (choi nia wui, ngai mm moi korng arn tor. Mm tet korng. Good luck deciphering that! LOL!) But on hindsight, it was a really good decision. Let's put it this way, he was very ambitious and very much passionate about the financial industry. So I gave him my full support. But in the 6-7 months or so that he was in that organization, I truly felt he was another person. We hardly spoke, he had his face glued to the computer or his phone the whole time. He was doing 12-hour days, even on most weekends. I'm ok with all of that. But then, I had to endure landmines!!! Never know things that might make him snap at me! So much so I've taken to checking with some of my students who worked with him on "What's the colour code for the day??" If it was red or amber it meant that I should be on my best behaviour. Towards the final month was the worse. Even if I sometimes touched his tushie (which I had every right to 😝😝😝) he'd snap!! And because we were WFH, I've been hearing shouting from his ironman office even with the door closed!! In all our 20+ yrs of knowing each other, I've never ever heard him shout. I'm sure those who have worked with him before would know he never shouts! Some days, even way past dinner time, I would hear the really "loud" meetings, and I just felt sorry for him, especially when the meetings were about explaining why social media boosting was necessary. As a marketing person myself, I can totally empathize with that. How many times have I had to explain 1001 reasons on why we should be on social media. 😒😒😒

Anyway, the day after he resigned, literally, even his aura changed colour! Even some people were commenting on my social media and saying he looked so much better these days. What's the secret? Well, the secret is dropping a toxic job I guess. Sometimes, despite the willpower and tenacity, if it just doesn't work, it doesn't work and surely, at this stage of our lives, it isn't worth it to lose yourself trying to turn stones into diamonds.

There are things that people may not understand about us. While we may have extremely different approaches at work - for one, he's the calm and patient guy (the recent shouting bout aside! LOL!) whereas I am the crazy firecracker and secondly, without a doubt, his strategic acumen is very sharp whereas I am much better at communications. (I'd like to say I am waaaayyy better! LOL!) But in terms of other work ethics and attitudes, we are like peas in a pod. We don't believe in politicking. We've gone through our fair share of it early in our careers, gone through the School of Hard Knocks working our asses off and learning the trade deeply. Work politics and power struggles hinder progress and productivity. In the last 8 years, I've had it a little easier as a consultant. I have a choice to stay out of any politicking that goes on in the workplace. I sometimes don't even understand why that needs to exist. MOH though, (the non-emotional one) would just say that everyone has their own style and personality at work. Everyone is different. I'll say! 

Also, at this stage in our careers, we no longer prioritize the status or the titles assigned to us. Director, Consultant, Manager, Executive - these are at the end of the day, just titles. In fact, when I fill in forms these days, I sometimes put my job as "Housewife" (when I was younger, I had a lot of issues with this. But now that I am more sure of myself, ok, so I am a housewife sometimes! Though not a very good one LOL!) What matters for us is to be involved or working on projects that carries positive impact, that makes a difference. I'm not just talking about CSR-type stuff. We want to be part of the waves of change. We want to do work that when we look back 10yrs from now, we would beam proudly and reminisce the struggles and hard work we put in to make that happen. We want to be able to laugh with joy when we regale our stories. Of cos, being paid due remuneration is a plus point. Ever since we moved out of Malaysia over 10 years ago, we've always made a promise that because we are seeking our fortunes in other people's land, we must give back to the local communities, transfer our knowledge and build capacity wherever we can. This is something that we have never failed to do no matter what. The number of people and teams we have coached, mentored, built up and empowered here in Myanmar over the last 8yrs would definitely be a "beam-with-pride" tale we look back upon in our older days.

Well, so then, what's next? MOH, he tells me his retirement came early. To be exact, 3yrs earlier. LOL! We had imagined retiring in 2023 and going off to do voluntary work in godforsaken places and trimming down on our material things a la tiny-house-living. We even drew a floor plan of our tiny house! LOL! The positive thing to look at this is that, unlike the last time where he was jobless, and my company in Cambodia was neck-high in debts, this time around, we're both debt-free. Sometimes, I feel the best productivity comes from people who work not because they need to pay off their loans or debts because they have less hang ups and are hungrier for end-results instead of being worried about losing their jobs. Then of cos, on the other end of the extreme are those who have gone all in and they've got everything to lose and therefore they'd fight to make it count - exactly what I did a million years ago when I started my own business! Anyway, we had a discussion about this situation obviously. I told him, it's not to say we've never been down-and-out before. We've already been there and done that.  We've never led an extravagant lifestyle and we're still pretty much simple and down-to-earth people. (Look at my wardrobe and you'll know! LOL!) I told MOH if we can't afford pistachios, I can switch to peanuts. If can't afford peanuts, I can switch to eggs. If can't afford eggs, I can switch to white bread. Then I told him, but I have an income and so I can eat pistachios. He can eat peanuts! LOLOL! Jokes aside, whilst being jobless during these times isn't ideal, we're grateful that there are no loans or debts that requires payment. Oh, oh, oh and no kids that we need to send to university or college! 🙏🙏🙏We've struggled and worked hard for so long, we're at the next stage of our lives, and for that, I'm really, really thankful. 

So, MOH is also using his available time to do some consultation work, as well as coaching and mentoring. He's also now like a sponge - absorbing and upgrading his skills and knowledge through learning and reading and is often forwarding things for me to upgrade my knowledge too. So then, his status is now "not single, but available" - if anyone's interested! LOLOL! 

One project that I am recently working on, well, not working on but coaching and mentoring, is for the #fitfam girls. We've been reading too many tales of people impacted by Covid-19 and so I recommended that the girls do up a plan to help the garment factory workers impacted by Covid-19 and turning to sex work as a means to survive. We all should always think of pitching our strengths together to help others. I believe in this strongly. And I've been coaching these girls for free all these while - or so they think.... hahahaha... nothings comes for free ya. So, I feel, it is now their turn to give back to the community and their country and their own people. I guess once the project hits the launch, there will be stories to share so stay tuned for this one! Covid-19 has been harsh economically for a lot of people. MOH and I have continued our monthly contribution to those in need by way of supporting local SMEs - such as SoyAi. Even back in our worse time period financially, we never stopped volunteering or sharing what we have. It is a gift to be able to share and to be able to help. Sometimes, I feel sorry too for the local street vendors whose daily income have been impacted but when I want to support them, I am taken aback by the hygiene levels. I'm just thinking if there are any associations or groups that could do an educational programme with them on hygiene or perhaps there are people who've already done so. Hopefully, things can improve for them. There are many individuals and groups doing really good things in Myanmar for the people and it is hopeful to see that humanity lives amongst us. 

Many friends have also set and attained, or halfway through attaining personal goals during these pandemic times. Congratulations for those who have done so. Those who are struggling somehow, keep fighting. And if you need some ass-kicking, reach out to me or MOH or someone you trust. Remember, everyone has their own struggles and it is ok to seek help. 

So, what's in store for 2021? We've both been here long enough for our work and our contribution to the local communities speak for itself. Some of whom I've literally watched transform from ugly ducklings into flying eagles while some are still unsure of their footing. I've had the privilege of sharing my SoyAi journey recently with the Asia Philanthropy Circle and I realized - WOW, that was an amazing journey with such a positive outcome! (a "beam-with-pride" moment although while going through it, I really wanted to hang myself on a daily basis!) We may not know what 2021 holds for us but we are going to stride forward with as much grace, positivity and tenacity as possible (except in February of 2021, cos that's CNY and it looks almost likely that I will not be able to travel home for CNY so I'm gonna be in depression mode - hardly any "grace" to it!!!)  If there's an opportunity that takes us away from Myanmar then so be it. If not, we will continue our work and contribution here to the communities and the people. The one thing that I have learnt during 2020 is that plans can go shit at any moment. Try not to put off things wherever possible and always be adapting and adjusting. Most importantly, always be grateful and thankful for what we have and because we are privileged to have, let's lend our hands to those who do not have. 

To 2020, it's been fiendishly complex. But hello 2021!