Married With No Kids

So So So true...... LOL!

They say time flies when one is having fun. And in a flash of a flash, I’m looking at Year 3 of married life. As with every year on our many, many wedding-versaries, I write something about our lives together as a “Me & You, Just Us Two” couple. In other words – Married With No Kids. Woots!

This year, we’re celebrating in Yangon, Myanmar – the land that everyone is speaking about now. Well, most everyone who wants a piece of the last Asian tiger or giant or whatever. We haven’t really got anything planned at all, seeing as we’re both busy with work and discovering Myanmar – both her charms and her oddities. But we will on the Bali wedding anniversary date, be spending time with the children at Life Garden and then heading off to the Shwedagon Pagoda (if weather is kind) to have a chat with Mr. B. We’re both thankful for this chance at starting a new chapter in our lives, thankful for being blessed with this new adventure of experiencing a new country TOGETHER and thankful that…. we survived the rough first few weeks of our move. LOL!

At our Bali wedding, a surprise video was played and watching the playback again and again now (and ROFLTKKCD each time), I can’t help but realize that the underlying “theme” to all the messages from my friends was one that voted for the fact that MOH would make a better husband than me being a good wife. What??? Even my parents feel that I lack as a wife, so much so that my Dad said he wants me to do some intensive training with my Mom – whom, I must say, in their 36 years of marriage, had taken care of my Dad so well, that he wants us out of the house as much as possible simply because Mom’s attention for him gets divided when we're around.

So, this year, I’m going to make some serious public admission about….yes, yes, yes, you were all right in saying that MOH makes a better husband in this equation. I won’t go too far back. Just judging my behaviour in the first few weeks of moving to Myanmar could’ve been enough to send any man packing. I am laughing now, thinking about it. OMG. I can’t believe how MOH had put up with all that. Long story short, I basically made life quite miserable for him because I was extremely stressed out with the internet situation, the electricity situation, the apartment situation – and all these while he himself was adjusting to the same issues as well as work. There was a week in there when we had electricity and I cooked for an entire week – breakfast, lunch and dinner – the same meal. Needless to say, I don’t think MOH will ever, ever eat Lap Mei Farn again in his life. Honestly, it was delicious. But I suppose, ….. and when he asked why I cooked so much, I gave him an earful about the electricity condition again. Admittedly, I was being unfair. A brat. I knew that. It wasn’t as if I was forced to move to Yangon. We both made the decision together after he got the offer. He moved to Cambodia for me so being fair, I moved to Yangon for him. Then, I brought up the fact that I had everything ready and well in Cambodia before he came over, etc, etc. And the brattiness starts again. Now, you can all understand why he lost weight the first month in Myanmar. LOL!

I’m just very thankful and very blessed to have such a patient man as a husband and therefore, our marriage and our relationship came out of that episode alive, well and unscathed. Actually, in all the years that I have known MOH, I have never once seen him throwing a tantrum or having a temper. Thank God! Thank God! Thank God! But hey – I think MOH is a very smart man. Very smart indeed. I have to say, possibly, the only guy who knows how to handle me and all my tantrums and princess behaviour. He knows not to fight fire with fire – he lets me be and then I feel like an idiot after the ‘outbreak’. During my brother’s wedding, he had this to say to him – “as a married man myself, my only advice to you is A Happy Wife = A Happy Life.” Whoa! Smart man indeed. If I was miserable, he’d be miserable too. Hahaha! Case in point – our move to Yangon.

And what about me as a housewife? Before I go on and before y’all judge me further, I’d like to reiterate the fact that in his wedding vows, MOH said he’ll do ALL the housework and ALL the cooking for me. So, to be fair, I can hold him to that, but I’ve been kind by doing my share of the housework. However – housewife material, I sure am not. In fact, I would readily admit that as a housewife, I fail miserably. Again – my first week in YG as a housewife – I almost died (which led to MOH being miserable). Look, all the cooking, I don’t mind doing. In fact, I enjoy (electricity permitting :P). Other than that, I dislike, dislike, dislike. I am anal about the cleanliness level so I still do part of the cleaning. My favourite aisle at the supermarket is where they sell all the household cleaning products. My weakest point is doing the dishes and laundry. The dishes – thank goodness, there’s only the two of us. And I’d serve MOH his meals in the same pot or the oven tray which I used for cooking – less dishes to wash. Just based on this alone, my Mom would fail me three times over as a housewife. But hello – practical vs. aesthetics :P The laundry… the laundry, the laundry. Because of our working hours, I am left with no choice but to handle the laundry department. Again, thank God it is just the two of us so every load is small. What is hung out to dry on the clothesline, would go straight from there into MOH’s wardrobe. I don’t iron. Sorry. And I have no freaking idea why he loves, loves, loves buying clothes that require ironing! None of my clothes need ironing! I think the years of being forced to iron my own school uniform has permanently scarred me :P So for MOH – there’s none of that pants with the middle crease line which supposedly speaks of extremely skilful ironing. My Mom thinks it is disgraceful that I let my husband walk out the door with a creased shirt.  Again,….practical vs aesthetics :P When she came over to visit us back in Cambodia, she even ironed MOH’s boxers. I was like *slap forehead ten times*. I also dislike folding clothes. I will not say too much about this for it will surely send my Mom over the edge. Oh – and no prizes for guessing who does the sewing and mending at home either.

But I think MOH did not marry me for my ‘housewifing’ abilities (or else I won’t be writing this piece today). I think the one thing that has kept the both of us going despite some of the usual ups and downs any couple has is the fact that at the end of the day, we both love a good laugh. If we can poke fun and annoy each other good-humouredly over unfolded laundry and dirty dishes for the next fifty years and beyond, we’re good. I do have a really good laugh every single time when MOH pretends to sing with the mop and does a poor imitation of MJ’s moves. I also think if we can live through all the snoring, the blanket-stealing, the farts and all that in laughter, we’re also good. After all, we’re married with no kids, so there’s only the two of us to entertain each other. We can’t possibly get bored playing practical jokes on one another, can we? J In fact, just this morning, I lost Stinky!! And then I realized MOH had taken Stinky out for a ‘tanning’ session since the sun was out. How sweet of him to do that. He knows Stinky is absolutely precious to me. But that’s how we are – he’d always threaten to throw Stinky out and I’d always threaten to throw his football stuff out.

Subsequently, for all the other wedding-versary dates that we will celebrate (kampong wedding, KL wedding, civil registration, etc), we’d probably do something crazy like take wedding photos in traditional Myanmar costumes, you know, stuff like that. At least, we can keep looking back again and again at our journey and laugh. Laughter, as how I see it, is one of the most important elements in our relationship. Even if it means tricking MOH into drinking potently spicy soup that makes him writhe on the floor in pain. Or laughing in his face when he says “All my football injury would come back to haunt me in my old age. You take care of me, ok?” Or when he takes a photo of me sleeping and hogging the bed as proof that I really do hog the bed.

They say marriage is hard work. I say, it shouldn’t be about work. It should be about laughter. From the wedding day celebrations till 3 years later, we’re never short on laughter at home and I hope that with all the blessings from everywhere and everyone, we can laugh our way well into our 50^th, 60^th, 70^th anniversary. (ok, so maybe 60^th and 70^th anniversary might be pushing it a little)

To MOH – thank you for all the love and the laughter and the patience for putting up with my OCD and crazies and for practising “A Happy Wife = A Happy Life”. You Da Best!! (haiya, ok la… I will TRY to take care of you la! J)