Healing Wounds

It's been a month since Humpty-Dumpty had a great fall. Ok, not HD himself. Just me. Looking back, I think it was so uncool to have fallen via running! The extent of the damage just didn't seem to match up! Nevertheless, I am healing. I still need to clean my "lake-like" wound every mornings and evenings and apply the antibiotic cream given by my doc in KL (No! No more International SOS from henceforth! To be fair, I wasn't upset with the paediatrician who treated me. She was just assigned to me and I believed she did what she could to the best of her abilities!)

Good news is, despite the inconveniences of the wound, I have resumed my training in full force. I have started my running and biking 2 weeks ago and as of yesterday, had my first official swim training after exactly 1 month away from the pool. And you know what? I was told today - I look a lot happier. Of course I am happier! I am not limping - finding it painful to even do something as simple as sit down and stand up and having to sleep in just one position! Major difference from right after the fall, where I was in pain all over.

Yet, even a couple of days after the fall, I sneaked out to the gym in the mornings to try to put in some training time at least. Instead of cycling to the gym like usual, I drove out - luckily, car is automatic gear. Haha! Much to MOH's chagrin and of course to the disapproval of my parents and a lot of my concerned friends (I love you guys too!). All those FB-slapping that I got. My goodness!

But you see, my dear friends - I am one-of-a-kind. I need to explain a little bit about my passion for the endurance sports. I've been doing it since I started going to the gym (more than 10 years now) and then by chance, I got hooked onto the races, which further motivated me to train even harder. I loved every second of my training and racing. Moving to Cambodia, I stopped training seriously and watched with eyes-wide-opened at my fitness level sliding dramatically - from marathon running to dying doing a mere 4km run. I was actually quite depressed! When I decided to make a so-called comeback after a 3-year hiatus, it took me forever to regain the glories of the past. But finally, after a lot of pain and determination, I was back on track and haven't looked back since. The 8 long months I took to regain my fitness level was a big haunting factor in my life. It was mentally challenging because several times throughout, I just wanted to call it quits and coupled with the fact that I had no training buddies with me at that time, it really took a lot for me to put in the gruelling hours. As such - I have this thing about not training. I fear the sliding motion of my fitness level.

Ok, I know that if you get off training for a couple of weeks or a month, it doesn't really quite affect your performance. But refer to above paragraph. Fear of the slide :P So, despite the slappings and threats of being tied to the bed and locks being changed and car keys being hidden, etc... and most of all, in spite of the pain, I went ahead with my training. I had to stay positive and not think about the bleeding wound. Furthermore, I had a race in June and was really quite worried about that. We always say - we race for fun and it's all about completing the race, etc, etc. It never is the case for me. You see, I am always in the Top Ten region in my category. So, true to form, I keep chasing the next best time. I am not a professional athlete and I accept that fact. I don't put in 5 hours of training time (IF I have the time, I would so do it!) but still - pride and glory at stake here!! Not to mention, for the June race, my parents will be watching me race for the first time ever and I am sponsored by JFT :) I definitely don't want to come in last!! There's also this psychological block in my head which tells me - if I don't put in the time to train, I will not get the desired results. So, like clockwork every morning, I wake up at 3.50am and I am hitting the machines by 4.15am so that I at least put in a good 3 hours before work starts for the day. 

I am stubborn. But I should be given points for my sheer determination, isn't it? (As an employer, I prefer to hire those who are into endurance sports as I know what kind of mental prowess they have :P) I know my knees are not as good as they used to be. The "great fall" had seriously knocked them out and I have no choice but to wear a knee guard everytime I train now (which I actually dislike) and after a long run or bike, I just feel like they would give way at any moment! The injuries have certainly slowed me down quite a bit but despite the pain, I am still going to push it with my training. I have just 2 months to go before the Bali Tri.

With a lot of positive feeling and energy, I believe in time, the "lake" in my knee would stop needing my care and attention and the pain in my knees would go away. Because people say - all wounds heal. They are never forever.